FINDING FULFILMENT IN RETIREMENT

'Volunteering in community service may be the missing piece that completes our overall well-being and contentment in retirement'

Grey Matters by Lily Fu

Eat, sleep, wake. Repeat. Eat, sleep, wake. Ad infinitum. Doing what we like, living how we want, and no one to answer to. Bliss! But sooner or later, we will wake up one morning feeling something is missing in our lives. The hours ahead seem stretched. Day in, day out, it’s the same old routine. Retirement is turning out to be one big yawn.

Once we have got over the initial joy of being master of our time, harsh reality sets in. While some find they are busier (not necessarily happier) than ever in retirement, there are those among us who complain about the long endless days of boredom, with nothing exciting or fulfilling to occupy them. Beyond looking after their grandchildren, going shopping, playing golf, travelling, watching TV, meeting up with friends, indulging in their hobbies or learning something new, what else is there? 

Is this all there is to living life to the fullest in our retirement years?

When we have the rest of our lives ahead of us, what would make us look forward to welcoming each new day? How does one get to find meaning in life, that elusive ‘ikigai’, that ‘raison d’etre’?

Perhaps we could borrow Marie Kondo's tagline 'spark joy', not so much to declutter our homes although that would certainly help when we downsize our home, and give away the bulk of our possessions accumulated over the years, but to apply the same concept to finding something that would spark joy in our lives.

Some have found pleasure in activities such as gardening, painting and writing at home. But these are primarily solitary activities. They spark joy only in us. Why not take it one level higher, one step further to also spark joy in others by sharing, caring and giving to others?

Can we be truly happy and at peace with ourselves while there are so many people out there needing help, and so many causes out there that could do with our support?

Being financially well-off does not guarantee happiness or peace of mind. We know that. Even the rich may feel a void in their lives, an emptiness that needs to be filled with something they have yet to discover. This is why many billionaires turn philanthropists when they approach their senior years. They know they can’t bring their wealth with them when they depart on what my mom euphemistically refers to as ‘a world cruise with no return date’. It makes them feel good to use their wealth for altruistic purposes. Many set up foundations to offer scholarships to deserving students and grants to promising start-ups.

Ordinary folks like us can contribute too.

For those of us with some money to spare, we can donate to a deserving charity or to a noble cause. Even RM10 can go a long way if many contribute. Some charities such as Hospice Malaysia, Alzheimer’s Disease Foundation Malaysia (ADFM), Malaysian Association for the Blind would welcome our help. Not all of us can afford to donate money, but we can certainly give our time, our energy, our experience, our talents/skill to help where it is needed. There are so many ways we can give back to society, including donating blood, even donating our bodies for research in University of Malaya’s ‘Silent Mentor’ programme. 

We could offer to help at animal shelters, soup kitchens, recycling centres, community gardens and many more. Temples, churches and mosques welcome volunteers to help out with their community service projects. If we have a skill, why not make use of it to do something for the community? Retired teachers can offer to give free tuition. Retired nurses can volunteer at community clinics or old folk’s homes. It is never more rewarding than putting a lifetime’s accumulated wisdom and experience to good use at one’s golden age. And if we have more than what we need, to give some to others who have much less.

Camie Choo, 61, winner of the Tender-Hearted category in the ‘Be a Star Beyond 50’ campaign (organised by The Star in collaboration with Nutren Optimum by Nestle Health Science), is a fine example of a senior who made use of her excellent sewing skills to sew 1000 facial masks during the Covid-19 pandemic to raise funds for SPCA Selangor. She is currently sewing hats for sale with proceeds going to Cheshire Home to train those with disabilities to be independent.

There is Kamil Yusof, 72, who regularly delivers food and essential items to families living in low-cost PPR flats. Twin sisters Choke Ling and Choke Wun, 79, help out regularly at Kebun-Kebun Bangsar community garden. 

There is no end to appeals for volunteers, but not many will respond. 

The best gifts are those that are meaningful, that light up the recipients' face and bring joy to their hearts. Indeed, giving to those in need shouldn't be restricted to festive seasons, but whenever the opportunity arises to help.

Doing good generates positive effects on our physical and mental health. Our time is gainfully occupied, and we experience a sense of greater self-worth. 

Nothing is more satisfying and more rewarding than being able to help others who are in need. Volunteering in community service gives purpose and meaning to our golden years. It is the missing piece that completes our overall well-being and contentment in retirement.

If tables were turned, wouldn’t we wish for help from others? Kindness begets kindness. Let’s spread more of that. The world certainly needs it.

IS THERE A RIGHT AGE TO RETIRE?

One idea to consider is to let workers decide for themselves and be given the option to work as long as they are able to, or need to, says gerontologist Lily Fu. Photo: 123rf.com

Thursday, 11 May 2023

By LILY FU

Former PM Tun Mahathir, once jokingly said the new retirement age in Malaysia will be 95 when he hands over his premiership to his successor. That was in 2018. He may have said it in jest but at the rate our demography chart is changing, Malaysia will reach ageing nation status by 2030, when we will see more people working well into their 70s. This is inevitable.

When the Employees Provident Fund (EPF) was set up in 1951, life expectancy then, believe it or not, was 55! With the retirement age set at 55, lump sum EPF withdrawals would be more than sufficient to sustain contributors through the short retirement period. We now know those figures were way off the mark. Advances in science, medicine and technology have drastically extended life span. Life expectancy in Malaysia currently stands at 76, and is set to rise further in the years ahead. 60 is the new 40, and living to a ripe old age of 80 and beyond is fast becoming the norm.

But what good is a longer life span if we do not have sufficient savings to enjoy those extra years? According to EPF figures, 51.5% of its 6.67 million members under the age of 55 have less than Rm10,000 savings. EPF’s 2019 Expenditure Guide for Malaysian individuals and families in the Klang estimates that an elderly couple living in the Klang Valley would need at least RM3090 a month for living expenses, or at least RM240,000 in savings by the time they retire at 55. With prices escalating and inflation showing no sign of abating, for those living in the urban areas, this figure will be grossly inadequate in the years to come.

With longer life span, retirees in their 60s-70s have elderly parents in their 80s-90s to look after. Long term age care alone for their parents will eat up whatever savings they may have. What about their own medical and healthcare expenses? The family structure has changed so drastically that parents can no longer expect their adult children to support them in their old age. Family size has shrunk, and with the grown children moving out to work or settle elsewhere, older couples are often left to fend for themselves.

That is why more and more retirees are returning to work life almost immediately after retirement. And older workers want to continue working past 60. Except for those with ample savings, most older workers especially those from the lower socio-economic group can ill-afford to stop working. 

But getting a job is easier said than done. Older workers face age discrimination in the workplace. Unless they have skills that are highly sought after, and unless the government offers a helping hand to retrain and upskill older workers, many have difficulty re-entering the job market once they have left it. It certainly doesn’t help when the public has a negative perception of older persons as frail, senile and a burden to support.

We are moving rapidly into an ageing society. Businesses that deal with retail, travel and hospitality, for example, would do well to employ more silver-haired staff to cater to customers in the older age group. Indeed, older people make good workers. Here’s why.

They are mature and conscientious. They are committed to their job, and do not job-hop. They have excellent people skills, and are experienced in handling crisis and emergencies. Older customers definitely feel more comfortable with older sales personnel who understand their needs and tastes much better. They are also more patient and confident in handling customers’ requests or complaints.

On the other hand, unless they have much-needed skills or expertise, older workers seeking to re-enter the workforce should not be too picky about job offers and be prepared to accept lower remunerations and fewer benefits.

In acknowledging the plight of retirees and those nearing retirement age, the government has sought to increase job opportunities by offering tax incentives for employers hiring older Malaysians. More companies are offering pre-retirement courses to help their soon-to-retire employees prepare for the years ahead. Whether this will make a significant difference remains to be seen.

One thing is for certain - we can expect the retirement age to continue going up in tandem with the rise in life expectancy. In developed countries such as Singapore and Japan, life expectancy is 82.8 and 84.8 respectively. The retirement age is moving towards 65. Former PM of Singapore, Lee Kuan Yew, famously said that 'retirement means death', and was in favour of doing away with the retirement age.

Let workers decide for themselves. They should be given the option to work as long as they are able to, or need to. 

As it is, we are already complaining about escalating prices and soaring expenses. With inflation eating into our nest egg, we just have to keep on bringing home the bacon, especially if we have college-going children and elderly parents to support. 

When older workers continue working, everyone benefits. The older workers themselves can remain self-supporting. For young people, they can be thankful that their working parents can fend for themselves and not be a financial burden to them. The government can save billions that would otherwise have to be spent on welfare aid for older citizens. Companies will be able to address labour shortage by hiring from a big pool of mature workers.

So, whichever way we look at the situation, the retirement age will have to be raised. The likelihood of doing away with a retirement age altogether will gain traction in the years ahead. Let's just hope it won't reach a situation where we have to work until we drop dead!

(The above article was first published in The Star under the monthly column 'GREY MATTERS'.)

A CRYING NEED FOR A DEPARTMENT OF AGEING TO TAKE CARE OF OUR ELDERLY

Unless we have prepared well, the years after retirement can be far from golden. — 123rf.com

by LILY FU

Wednesday 12 April 2023

Working folks envy their colleagues who have retired. No more nine to five, no more taking orders from the boss, no more stress from meeting deadlines or worrying about ROI.

They have all the time now to do what they like, go where they want and be able to finally pursue their dreams, whether it’s to travel, take up a new hobby or get a degree.

This is an idealised picture of retirement. Unless we have prepared well, the retirement years can be far from golden. Just take a walk in the inner-city streets, the back alleys, or visit low-cost flats (PPR). You will see the other side of retirement. Not a pretty picture.

Every so often we read about an elderly abandoned at the bus-stop or at a hospital.

According to the Social Welfare Department (JKM), about 2000 elderly have checked into welfare homes over the past five years. The actual figure is probably much higher. An estimated 71% of EPF contributors do not have enough savings to live above the poverty line.

To be fair, there have been improvements over the years. Senior citizens enjoy discounts on public transport. Medical care is practically free at government clinics, and easily affordable at public hospitals. Elder-friendly facilities are now fixtures in public buildings, and there are special lanes in government departments to serve the elderly.

There are plans to have an activity centre for seniors (Pusat Activiti Warga Emas or PAWE) in every parliamentary constituency. The grant for each PAWE to run the centre has been raised from RM33,330 to RM50,000 annually. All very good, but these improvements have been long overdue, and are a very small step towards preparing for the future.

There are plans to have an activity centre for seniors (PAWE) in every parliamentary constituency such as this one in Taman Medan, Petaling Jaya. The grant for each PAWE to run the centre has been raised from RM33,330 to RM50,000 annually. These improvements have been long overdue, and are a very small step towards preparing for the future. - Filepic

Based on findings of the on-going Malaysia Ageing and Retirement Survey (MARS) conducted by Universiti Malaya’s Social Wellbeing Research Centre, and involving 5,613 respondents, Malaysia will be classified as a super-aged nation by 2056 when 20% of the population is aged 65 and above.

Academicians and researchers on ageing have conducted countless surveys over the years. It is such a waste of time, money and effort when nothing much happens after they have presented their findings to the government.

The proposal to introduce legislations against elder abuse and abandonment has been brought up now and then over the past two decades. Each time the issue raises a storm of controversy, then the buzz fizzles out till the next time it is mentioned again in Parliament.

As an example, in Sept 2019, then Deputy PM and Women, Family and Community Development Minister Datuk Seri Dr Wan Azizah Wan Ismail announced the Senior Citizens Bill would be tabled in Parliament in early 2021.

With the subsequent change in government, the bill was left in limbo. Fast forward to March 2023. Current Deputy Minister Aiman Athirah Sabu, in responding to a question, said the bill would be tabled in Parliament for the first reading in 2024! When that time comes, will there be yet another delay? Will the same scenario repeat itself?

Speaking in the Dewan Rakyat recently, Women’s Minister Datuk Seri Nancy Shukri, commended the National Senior Citizens Advisory and Consultative Council (MPPWEN) on their role they played. The council meets only twice a year. The urgency is not there.

There is a crying need for an inter-ministerial committee on Ageing. Any action plan on ageing should involve more than just the Women, Family and Community Development Ministry.

NGOs, CSOs and representatives from the B40 group should also be at the table. These are the grassroot leaders who are familiar with the problems faced and are directly impacted by any decisions made. They speak from lived experience, and their voices should be heard.

Bear in mind proposals and plans are just that, on paper and in discussions in meeting rooms where the elderly who are the target group do not have a seat at the table.

Even when Acts and Bills are passed, implementation is painfully slow due to bureaucratic red tape. The Social Welfare Department (JKM) has too much on its plate: from the welfare of women, children, senior citizens, OKU to the community at large.

Each demographic group has its own set of issues to deal with. When resources are limited, priority is often given to women, children and youths.

After all, for the elderly their days are numbered. They do not contribute much to the economy and in fact are seen as a drain on limited resources for welfare.

These retirees and pensioners, mostly in their 70s and 80s, have contributed much to nation-building in their younger days. Now in their twilight years, they are overlooked, if not forgotten in the broader scheme of things.

The haves can take care of themselves. Our concern is the have-nots – theB40 elderly and those living without family support. Aside from the crumbs given to senior citizens at every Budget allocation, they are often shut out in the job market, and denied opportunities to better themselves.

What they need is sustained financial support, not one-off handouts as and when, and also access to long-term health care. How long do the elderly have to wait for better days ahead in the time they have left? It is a time bomb ticking away when we consider the ramifications an ageing population presents.

(The above article was originally published in Star Silver pullout of The Star under the column 'Grey Matters'.)

ARE WE MODELS OF FILIAL PIETY FOR OUR CHILDREN?

Are we baby boomers the last line of defence left to uphold and preserve filial piety? If our adult children and grandchildren seem lacking in respect for their elders, are we as much to blame as the changing times and hence, changing values? Have we pampered and mollycoddled them too much? Have we allowed them to get away with indiscipline and disrespect to their parents and grandparents?

Getting to be a common sight in the city - the elderly having to fend for themselves.

What about us? We have elderly parents in their 80s to look after. Are we exemplary models for our adult children to emulate? Can we look at ourselves in the mirror and honestly say that we have looked after our elderly parents well, and given them our love and respect?

When was the last time we held our elderly parents' hands or gave them a hug?

When was the last time we hugged our parents or held their hands? They don't need gifts of money, hampers of food or bouquets of flowers. All they want is the reassurance that they have not been forsaken and forgotten by their family members.

When our parents are gone, can we ever forgive ourselves for neglecting them in their final years? The time for us to start is right now, before the sands of time run out for our elderly parents, and it's too late for regrets.

How we treat our elderly parents is how our children will treat us one day in our old age. They will learn from us.

IT'S CRUMBS AGAIN FOR SENIORS, LAMENTS ADVOCATE

KUALA LUMPUR: Gerontologist and advocate for seniors, Lily Fu (pic), wishes there are more funds for the elderly.

"Well, a bit of good news for some sectors but, generally, crumbs again for seniors. Not much to cheer about.

“If only we had a minister or an agency on aging to speak out for older people.

“All of us will age, and we also have elderly parents and grandparents. Most of the MPs are not spring chickens either.

“Why are the needs of the elderly often ignored or overlooked?” she lamented after the revised Budget 2023 was tabled at Parliament on Friday.

Fu is disappointed that there was no mention of age-friendly facilities and infrastructure or tax incentives for companies to employ older persons.

“There was no mention of special digital literacy programmes to help seniors grapple with technology.

“There was no tax allocation for families looking after the elderly who need long-term care or those with comorbidities.

“I feel that most of the allocations are catered for the B40 group,” said the 75-year-old, who is also the founder of Seniors Aloud, an online network of senior citizens.

Malaysia entered an ageing society in 2020.

With the population of its senior citizens (age 65 and above) standing at 7.3% now, the country is expected to enter an aged society about 21 years from now and eventually turn into a super-aged society in 2056.

The process is faster than previously projected due to a declining fertility rate and low birth rate.

According to the Statistics Department, a total of 439,744 babies were born in 2021, a 6.7% (31,760 births) drop from the previous year.

The Total Fertility Rate has also shown a declining trend from 4.9 children per woman of childbearing age (15 to 49 years) in 1970 to 1.7 in 2021.

Despite the Budget 2023 not targeting many goodies for senior citizens, retired teacher Josephine Odela Soosay Raj, 82, said she is still glad that overall, the budget benefits most Malaysians.

“From what I see, the budget will enable our country to move into a new phase that will see more foreign investors coming in.

“I’m also pleased that our Prime Minister is looking at the needs of the younger generation. He spoke about the problem of pornography and upgrading schools in rural areas.

“So for me, I feel that our country will have a new image,” said the former teacher of SK St Theresa 1 here.

The grandmother of five is happy about the government’s focus on the welfare of padi farmers and rubber tappers.

“A lot of money will be spent to upgrade clinics and hospitals and repair roads in flood-prone areas.

“I don’t mind that the senior citizens’ interests are left aside for now.

“Let our leader see to the needs of others. Once that’s in place, he should see to our needs,” she added.

(The above article was first published in The Star on Sunday 26 Feb 2023. The comments were made in response to the PM's Budget Speech delivered in Parliament on Fri 24 Feb.)

LAUGHTER & NOSTALGIA AT THE BOOK REVIEW OF 'OUR STORIES, OUR LEGACY'

 
The happy faces reflect the success of the first book review held recently to connect the readers of  "Our Stories, Our Legacy" with the writers. More about the event in the writeup below, courtesy of Liow Moi Lee, editor of the book. 

Copies of the book are available for sale at these locations below: Mont Kiara, Bangsar and Ampang. Please contact Lily for more info. Thank you.